


Under His Skin

by incapricious



Category: Merlin (BBC)
Genre: Episode Tag, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-01-20
Updated: 2009-01-20
Packaged: 2017-10-05 13:29:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/42225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/incapricious/pseuds/incapricious
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As he lies in the straw of the dungeon, Merlin realizes that he is offended that Arthur is an arse. Because he's not supposed to be.  He's supposed to be beautiful all the way through.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Under His Skin

**Author's Note:**

> Episode tag for Merlin 01x01. Thanks to scrtkpr for the beta!
> 
> Note: dialogue taken from the episode directly in a few places!

The first time Merlin sees Arthur, he thinks, "Oh, so that's what beauty is."

He's seen the delicate beauty of a dew-covered spider web and the destructive beauty of fire, but this is the first time he has beheld the kind of beauty to make his breath catch. This is the kind of beauty from stories, the like of which does not exist in his village, or any other village, most likely. This golden-haired man is--

The man hurls a knife, laughing at the squeal of the poor wretch holding the target. Then he throws another one. And another one.

"Right," thinks Merlin, "this man is a golden-haired arse."

He tells him so, too. He's not sure why. Granted, Merlin has never been the type to hold things back. If he were, he wouldn't be here in Camelot rather than back at home, traipsing around the woods with Will and getting into the kind of trouble that now, in comparison, seems quite minor.

(Of course the man is Prince Arthur. Of course.)

But even if he weren't the type who normally told off strangers for bullying weaklings, Merlin thinks that this time he would have done it anyway. As he lies in the straw of the dungeon, he realizes that he is offended that Arthur is an arse. Because he's not supposed to be. He's supposed to be beautiful all the way through.

The idea is embarrassing. He doesn't know why he thought it. When Gaius arrives to take him home, Merlin swears to himself that he will stay clear of Arthur. Obviously he does strange things to Merlin's mind.

-

Merlin tries to keep that promise, he really does. The next day when Arthur walks by, Merlin doesn't even look.

Well, he does look, but just out of the corner of his eye. And just to make sure no weapons have been hurled unexpectedly at him. It's a safety precaution, really.

It's not Merlin's fault that Arthur calls out to him. Merlin has to answer, doesn't he? Arthur is the Prince and heir to the throne, and Merlin has only just got all of the tomato seeds out of his hair.

The problem is that as soon as Merlin turns around, he jumps right back in where he left off yesterday. Arthur is beautiful on the outside but ugly on the inside, and Merlin wants to rip back that thin veneer of gold and expose the grotesqueness underneath. Anger bubbles up inside of him. No one should hide his true nature from the world.

But when Arthur stalks towards him, swinging a mace, Merlin thinks he sees this gleam in his eye, as if he's hinting that it's all for fun and he's not really so bad.

"So, how long have you been training to be a prat?" asks Merlin, testing his theory.

"You can't address me like that," says Arthur. He's laughing, though, and Merlin begins to hope that Arthur's beauty runs a little deeper than it previously appeared.

"Sorry," says Merlin. "How long have you been training to be a prat, my Lord?" He bows his head, eyes trained on Arthur, gauging his reaction.

For a moment, his hope turns into triumph: Arthur laughs again. Merlin has won. Merlin has-- no. Merlin ducks as the mace flies at his head. The hope has now fallen off a cliff, where it lies broken and bleeding on some craggy rocks. With vultures circling overhead.

After the fight, Merlin is breathless and exhilarated in ways he can't describe. The only thing that saves Arthur from being categorized as a complete and utter arse is that he doesn't have Merlin thrown in jail again. But he's definitely not someone who is worth another thought.

So why can't Merlin get him out of his head?

-

The dragon is lying. He has to be.

-

It's not until the Lady Helen is aiming the dagger at Arthur's heart that Merlin accepts the truth of the dragon's words. Fine, Arthur needs him. Arthur will die without him. Quite literally. In a matter of seconds. He said he would lend a hand to whoever wanted to kill the Prince, but actually, that was a lie. He knows it was a lie because when he sees that Helen is standing under the massive iron chandelier, he doesn't think, "Hmm, if that fell on her it would stop her, but then she would be mortally wounded, which would make me a murderer." Instead, he thinks, "Die, bitch, die."

Even when he sees her true form, and recognizes her for the mother who lost her sorcerer son, all he can think is, "How dare you try to kill Arthur." Her loss was terrible, but that doesn't matter to him right now. She's levered her ruined body up and flung her dagger, and her aim is true. It's as natural as breathing for Merlin to slow time and grab Arthur, pulling him out of the way of the spinning blade.

Arthur is solid and warm and alive. They lie on the floor, Merlin's arm wrapped around Arthur's chest, and Merlin feels Arthur's heart beat once and then twice, the time between the beats stretched out by the spell.

For the first time in his life, Merlin feels completely at peace.

He lets go of the magic and the room spins back into life, dissolving that peace. They stand and face the King, who is staring at Merlin in wonder, along with the rest of the court. Along with Arthur. Arthur is looking at Merlin as though he's never seen him before. Perhaps he hasn't, really.

This will be all right, thinks Merlin. Arthur will respect him now, for what he did. Arthur will listen to him, and agree to change his bullying ways. They won't exactly be equals, because Merlin isn't royalty, but they will be friends, and--

"You shall be Prince Arthur's manservant," declares the King.

Merlin wants to protest, but then Arthur's face contorts with a mix of disgust and horror. Anything that annoys Arthur that much can't be so bad. Merlin holds back a smirk and tries to look put out instead.


End file.
